and so it begins

Well, I am going to world-wide-web my europe trip. I was in my very, very young 20s. I was alone and I was 1,000% full of confidence. I had no reservations. I had no plan other than getting to Munich at some point to see a friend. I flew into Paris, and so Paris is where my journey began.
You understand that I have to leave some things out of this silly re-write. Landon can read. Kevin can't yet, but he might learn one day. and then he might take an interest in this blog he's never glanced at. and, above all, my daughter will likely read this one day. when she's 25 and I tell her I have a blog. and if she Ever thinks she's going to Europe by herself...she's so sorely mistaken. and she is certainly not going to hear all the details of this trip. some skeletons are supposed to stay in the closet.
Need more details after this....ask me after a bottle of wine.
you may think i'm exaggerating how much i talked about food. i assure you, as much as it pains me, i'm copying this brown leather book word for word. i have always been a foodie. before foodie was an adjective. i did time-stamp it. maybe i hoped i would publish it one day. back then my dreams were probably different than a mom with a blog...but as I read this now, for the second time, i assure you I am still the exact same person i was then.

Noon -
I made it. My plane landed 2 hours ago and it has taken me this long to figure out how to get from the airport to Paris. I'm finally on the right train! Feel satisfied. Finding a hotel will be a different story.
5:00 -
oh i love this city. it's so scary and beautiful and fun! after 4 hotel stops and practically touring Paris with my 90 pound suitcase - i found a room. it's small, but i'm sitting on my BALCONY right now, over-looking the streets of Paris! what a life. i had to climb out my window to get out here. the weather is perfect. it was sunny and cool earlier and now i feel my skin tanning, it's so hot.
after checking into the hotel, i had a wonderful lunch at an outdoor cafe. no one spoke english so I just let them order for me. i had baked chicken, scalloped potatoes and yummy french bread. after the meal, i attempted to order a glass of chardonnay and got a huge bowl of chocolate ice cream! pleasant mistake.. i walked the streets for a couple of hours and all of the sudden I was in the middle of a huge parade! everyone was just dancing all over the street! when in paris....
i'm trying to convince myself to take a nap so i can checkout the nightlife later. havent slept yet, but too excited to try!
11:00-
i finally did fall asleep and it was hard to get up. i went to dinner and had delicious bruschetta and Bordeaux. there was a very cute boy beside me at dinner, but all we could repeatedly say was "bonjour!" i thought the chili peppers in the olive oil was a decorative touch. i proceeded to douse my food with it and tried to remain cute as my eyes watered and my nose ran.
I then found an outdoor jazz cafe and drank wine and listened to live jazz that seriously rivaled New Orleans.
when i say i'm from texas, all people want to talk about is the death penalty.
i've never been happier than i was tonight! i could've stayed there forever, but decided to head back to the hotel. i'm heading to switzerland tomorrow and, i assure you, i am studying language books so that if i'm at a table by a cute boy again on this trip...it leads to more than "bonjour!"
i never want to forget the feeling i had tonight. sheer happiness. i love paris

"until you spread your wings, you have no idea how far you can fly"

About 10 years ago, I finished graduate school. I had lots of letters behind my name. my parents threw me a party at a clubhouse, then sent me on a cruise. spoiled? yes. rotten? i hope not.

but see, there is this. i went to europe.
i had just finished school. i knew the rest of my life was forever. so i asked. i begged. i had to go to europe.

and also, there's this. i had to go alone.
i didn't want my family there. i didn't want to take a friend. i needed to grow. i needed to be independent. i had to do it on my terms. God bless my parents that i ever even begged. God bless my parents that they finally said, Go.

i went to europe, alone, for about 6 weeks. i had no plans...other than "see western europe" ... a euro rail pass and a suitcase. it was, undoubtedly, one of the best experiences of my life. one of those unreal experiences that i often wonder if it really did happen. but it did. my parents and their sleepless nights will attest.

so tonight something triggered my thinking of that time. of before kevin, before kids, before this beautiful life i lead. i thought about europe and i thought, "i wrote." it came to me like a revelation, although i'm sure i've just never thought to think of it before. but i visualized a tan journal and i knew i wrote.

so tonight i found it. i haven't read it since i wrote in it. years. i found the red suitcase full of everything imaginable from that trip. tickets, napkins, matchbooks, maps...and i got the journal out. it's just so wonderful. i've never appreciated being a writer more. i wrote it all down.

i know that a lot of you read this blog to see pictures of my fabulous children. i don't blame you. they're kickass. but i want to write my europe journal so badly. you have two choices; be patient or stop reading.

i know i was young...24 years old? but i was SO young. i was a terrible writer (i don't feel i've evolved that much) but i have to stay true and write it word for word. i wrote on the right side of the journal, as you should, but i also wrote things on the left side. little bubbles that said "Remember!....." things i wasn't going to write about in my narrative but wanted to remember. they are absolutely my favorite part of the journal, although sadly, i don't really remember any of them.

so tomorrow i will start, as my journal starts, in Paris. see you there.